Daily Archives: November 5, 2015

Not Freaking Out

long road

I suppose like anyone who’s quite near the start of a really long term weight loss journey, when I really stop to consider the size of the task ahead of me, it’s quite daunting. In fact, scrap that – clearly I’m trying to win today’s prize for the world’s biggest understatement…terrifying is a better word. I mean, I’m doing ok – the positive mindset has taken root, I’m standing in the sweet spot and I feel like I’ve come a long way, not to mention picking up a whole posse’s worth of company as an amazing support network. So my foundations are really solid..I can almost hear the ever-increasing sound of marching boots (and flip-flops, eh Fleury!) as more and more people fall in behind us and beside us on the road to Skinny Town…we’ve totally got this.

In terms of the size of the task though, I’m barely off the starting blocks. Right now, as documented by my encounter with the bastard in the bathroom last weekend, I need to lose 144.5 pounds. I mean, that’s a lot of pounds, right? It’s a whole other person’s worth of pounds. And I know I’m sort of breaking it down into bite sized chunks, our recent trip was my first short term goal and hitting New Year’s day as a size 22 is my next…there will be others after that.

But I’m trying to get two steps ahead of the asshole in my mind, build a solid strategy you know..? Just in case he wheels out the big guns and starts trying to freak me out by getting in my face about just how far away Skinny Town is. Several of you are much further down the road than the rest of us, and some have started from even further away and so your journey is even longer than mine. If any of you want to share your own thoughts on how you’re sidestepping the ‘freak out’ button in the face of this epic journey we could all pick out the bits that we like and line them up ready to pull on as required.

Despite being a fat girl with form – as in I’ve been up and down the sizes multiple times before – I’d struggle to articulate exactly what kept the momentum going for me in times past, because most of the diets I’ve done in my life were started with blind enthusiasm and I just hoped for the best. Twice in my grown up life I’ve sashayed through the gates of Skinny Town to great fanfare, and plenty of other times I’ve seen it on the horizon, camped in the suburbs for a while but somehow I’ve ended up heading back to Mooseville on the fucking bullet train without stepping so much as a toe over the town boundary.

I have no idea what makes the difference between seeing the journey through right to the end, and not. Each time I’ve set off it’s been from a little bit further away and that bothers me, a lot. I totally fall in line with the statistics and that offends me, given that I like to consider myself as unique. My big hairy audacious goal has to work…I don’t want to be a statistic any more. Any nuggets of wisdom would be most welcome, from those in the posse who’ve already found the secret to keeping the momentum going long term.

I’m not leaving anything to chance this time 🙂

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