They Didn’t Burn A Hole

I had a major stress head on yesterday morning. I’m doing some self-development sponsored by my work this week, learning how to interpret and administer a psychometric tool, so I’m on a three day course in the city near where I live. I’d left home in plenty of time and it was all going so well, right up to the point that I went to turn into the road leading to the venue, only to discover the road was closed. Beautiful.

So it’s rush hour, twenty minutes before the course was due to start and I’m driving past where I need to be, in a one-way city loop with no idea how to double back and find a different way in. I know, I think to myself, I’ll call the hotel and ask them. And that would’ve been a really good plan if anyone had answered the fucking phone.

Almost exactly twenty minutes later, I figured it out, but not before I’d turned the air blue inside my car. By the time I’d parked up and done a fast hobble across to the hotel, through the lobby and up to the first floor I was utterly frazzled. My hair, which had looked styled and smooth when I left home had gone rogue on me. The more hot and bothered I got, the wilder my hair got, and by the time I arrived I looked like Albert Einstein. I had big sweat patches under my arms and my cheeks were a lovely mottled shade of purple, I mean we’re talking off-the-chart attractive.

As I half skidded in a very lopsided fashion into the middle of a bunch of delegates, my eyes were drawn like magnets to an enormous tray of bacon sandwiches. Then I caught a whiff of them, and it was pretty much game over…all thoughts of how frazzled I was disappeared, and the deal was just about sealed when some random bloke shook me by the hand and passed me a plate.

Now, bearing in mind this is week two of my experiment, and I’ve hit the point in my dieting week I’m supposed to eat all my weekly points. As I stood there salivating with the plate in my hand you bet your sweet ass I was furiously totting up how many points I’d need to knock off my tally. I could have it, one hundred percent guilt-freeGet in!

Except, I’d already had breakfast in the car on the way there. I’d made a coconut and mango breakfast smoothie with a base of unsweetened almond milk, and it’d been really thick and filling. It dawned on me that I wasn’t actually hungry.

Now, you’ve got to bear in mind that a small detail like that has very rarely stopped me from indulging myself in the past. And I don’t know what was so different in that moment, but yesterday, it did stop me. I wanted that bacon bap like you wouldn’t believe, but on the other hand I didn’t want it at all, so I listened to the voice of reason, and I put the plate down. I went into the bathroom and had a stern word with the birds nest on my head instead.

That was a wise decision as it turns out, because those bacon baps were not actually for the delegates of the course I was on. Turns out the bloke who handed me a plate assumed I was with his lot and that’s why he tried to feed me. As if looking like a mad professor wasn’t embarrassing enough, I narrowly avoided getting in bother for the unauthorised consumption of pig flesh.

It wasn’t the only bullet I dodged yesterday…I managed to sidestep a whole host of booby traps, including a bowl of ginger nuts and fruit shortbread biscuits which were staring me down from the coffee area, not to mention several unwise options at the lunch buffet. I had my weekly points in my back pocket, but strangely they didn’t burn a hole. I wasn’t bothered. I’d decided at the top of the week that I was going to treat me and my boy to Chinese food one night, and I was happy enough knowing that treat was coming. Decision made, move on.

That’s another step forward, right?

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16 thoughts on “They Didn’t Burn A Hole

  1. Wow! You have truly changed your thinking to that of a heathy and self-nurturing person! You inspire us all.

  2. So proud of you. I can relate to the hair. I just got back from visiting my Mum in England and I walked around with frizzy hair almost every day. It didn’t matter what I did with it -rollers, hot iron etc… You will be proud of me when I say I didn’t eat all the Cadbury’s! I tried the Daim and I liked it but not enough to replace my Maltesers and Flake’s 🙂 I had some I hobnobs but not enough to do any damage. I walked a lot and got my 10,000 steps most days. I ended up losing a couple of pounds but I’ve found them since I’ve been home doh! I checked in with you a few times when I was away and I continue to be impressed with your turn around, you’re having great success, keep it up 🙂

    1. Ah thanks lovely! I’m glad you had a great time and I’m impressed you lost whilst you were here despite me clearly leading you astray with daim and hobnobs! Keep plugging away Jo! ?

  3. Dee, I’ve read and enjoyed your blog for almost a year now. (even when I had put a major pause on my own weight loss journey for a while.) I thought you’d like to know that yesterday I made a pretty big leap of faith, specifically because of you. In the past if i amped up movement, added some workouts, and mildly monitored my intake, I was sure to lose at least a pound to two a week. Well after some hormonal middle age hell over the last year, my already slow metabolism seems to have dead-stopped. A few weeks ago I began going to the gym every day, kept an eye on intake, and didn’t have a single(!) glass of red wine- last year I’d have been dropping the pounds easily. Now? Not.one.single.ounce. After much much grumbling and my own blue streak, I officially joined Weight Watchers yesterday – only because of you. Because I know it can be done, and because I know it works – slowly maybe, but somehow having your story for all these months is acting as a grounding for me. I know it’s the right thing- the right, albeit really annoying, I-can’t-believe-I-only-get-how-many-fregin-points-points(?), being-a-woman-my-age-is-NOT-fair, (stamps foot petulantly) absolutely right thing to do. So thank you, Thank you for your humor, your honestly and your consistency in journaling your highs and especially your lows. You’ve helped to shift the life of a stranger half a world a way by being the touchstone I needed to make the best next step. Thank you and truly, best wishes. I’m cheering us all on ?.

    1. Oh holy moly Christine, you just made me cry! Thank you so much for your amazing note, I shall put that in my special jar and bring it out when I’m having a bad day! I am cheering you on from Skinny Towers, and I can’t wait to hear how it’s going for you. One foot in front of the other and repeat, right? Good luck, we’ve got this ???

      1. Well when you said you cried, of course then I had to tear up myself. My own ‘shitbird scale’ finally moved today! (i’m an everyday weigher- instructions not to from the experts be damned ?) I’ll let you know as my progress continues-(and continue cheering you on) with much appreciation from your new American Groupie ?

        1. Yey for victories, I’m glad the needle is moving! I personally couldn’t weigh every day, I’d be a complete basket case ? Keep up the good work, it sounds like you’re doing great!

  4. Dee, this is such fantastic news…I mean it’s a true sign that you are making the transformation from losing weight to a lifestyle of just plain eating right. I track everything I eat even today and I was hungry yesterday. All day. Couldn’t figure out why and decided to eat since I was hungry. Didn’t go hog wild with bad choices. I just ate because that’s what my body told me I needed. Same with you… you could have the bacon sandwich, but you weren’t hungry and walked away. That’s a HUGE sign of progress.

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