So we’ve had the most amazing trip. I’ve made some awesome memories and one of the nights in particular will stay with me always…early cocktails on the terrace of the Skyfall Lounge watching the sun set and seeing Las Vegas come alive, followed by dinner on the terrace of Olives restaurant at The Bellagio, whilst their fountains danced right in front of us…it was magical.
This was day two. Bearing in mind how flexible the weight watchers food plan is, up to that point I had felt completely in charge of me…keeping track of points when you’re constantly being offered things where you can only estimate point values – like the airline meals for example – is always going to be a challenge. But you’ve got to eat, on an 11 hour flight, right? And when you cross time zones and end up with an extra 8 hours in your day you kind of have to adjust stuff, mess around with your budget a bit.
I took a balanced approach…accepting a little pot of ice-cream with the movie on the flight felt okay because I’d refused a bread roll and chosen not to eat desserts and cake with the meal…not perfect, but given the asshole’s campaign to make me forget the diet for the duration of the trip I felt I was firmly in control of my choices. So I was doing ok.
But going back to our memorable night..getting a table on the terrace at the Skyfall Lounge is a privilege reserved for a very chosen few. My friends had made the reservation weeks in advance, emailing details about the fact we were celebrating a milestone birthday to help get it in the bag, and so there we were…pre-dinner cocktails with the best view in town. Amazing. And then the manager rocked up with a surprise birthday cake bomb which he proceeded to souse in limoncello, cover with two huge dollops of whipped cream and present to me with a flourish. What a lovely gesture…but man oh man, I’d quietly made skinny food choices all day, trying to juggle stuff so I could fit all the planned treats in, including cocktails and a special dinner.
So do I say ‘thanks but no thanks’, and throw the gesture back in his face, or do I eat it as he’s standing there expectantly, having just presented the fat lady who is clearly no stranger to cake with the best boozy creamy cake ever. Let’s look at the evidence…I’m a people pleaser. I do in fact love cake. And limoncello. And cream! And they’re all on a plate together in front of me, an unexpected gesture made by someone who wanted to do a nice thing, just for me. And the asshole in my mind is on it like a car bonnet…you ungrateful cow, of course you have to eat it…it would be totally rude not to, he’s trying to make your birthday treat extra special, you’ll look ridiculous if you make a fuss and say you don’t want it…
Dilemma. And bugger me, fast forward a few hours…we’d had a magical dinner, again, seats on the Olives restaurant terrace are really difficult to engineer since everybody wants them yet they aren’t bookable in advance. We got really lucky, and the evening was made more enjoyable still by our waiter Paul, who was utterly charming, and just wanted us to have an awesome time. And would you bloody believe it, after my carefully chosen meal he arrived at the table with profiteroles with a Happy Birthday piped in chocolate and birthday candles, just for me, thinking he was going to make my evening extra special.
Again with the dilemma…and again with the asshole who by this time of course was hopping up and down like Rumplestiltskin screaming don’t be rude just eat it and be thankful for the lovely gesture, don’t even think about saying no! Once again I’m faced with Hobson’s choice…put someone’s feelings before my own and risk the wheels coming off my food plan…or put myself first and hurt their feelings. Twice in one otherwise perfect night!
So…over to you guys. What do you reckon happened..? And what would you have done in my place..? Bear in mind, I’m not perfect and I’m navigating the road to skinny town the best way I can…I’ll share the outcome tomorrow but I’m curious as to how you all would have reacted ?
Loved discovering your blog (found it from Cranky Fitness)! Looking forward to keeping up with you. Please visit my new blog as well 🙂
Livinglivelydaily.blogspot.com
Hey Alana, welcome to the posse and yes of course I’ll call in to your new blog to say hello and have a look around – I genuinely hope you take as much from the process of blogging as I do, it’s been a game changer for me in so many more ways than I could explain, and I wish you luck my friend. D x
First of all Happy Birthday!
As I was reading this I was so uncomfortable because I am such a people pleaser. I always put people’s feelings before my own. I would have been scared that once I got a taste from the sugar it would have been full on bingefest! The only saving grace would be knowing I was in the “sweet spot” and feeling strong I would be able to handle one bite and then pass it on to the other girls. The only other option would be to lie and say you’re diabetic but you’re still deflating the server’s joy. (No offense to diabetics, my Mum and son are diabetics). I’m sure you handled it well.
Glad you enjoyed Vegas, safe travels home.
Jo.
Thanks Jo for the birthday wishes…I’m clinging on to 49 for just a couple more weeks but I shall pop your birthday wishes in a safe place and bring them out on the big day to make me smile along with all the others as I embrace these steps into my next decade (with a large gin and a bemused feeling that the last 30 years feel like they happened at warp speed!) D x
Doesn’t it seem we fall into this all the time? Depending on my frame of mind, I would probably had a few bites of each and of course encouraged others to share. My problem on these trips is I overdo it on alcohol, which leads to not the best food decisions. Hopefully you enjoyed, perhaps took a long walk the next morning.
Can’t wait to hear about it!
Hey Beth, yes the cocktail factor has definitely featured front and centre, although to be fair I can safely speak for most of our party when I say picking one that tasted nice has been one of our biggest challenges. Being game girlies though there’s been a collective determination to keep trying till we picked a winner, and a few sore heads because of it!
I would NOT have eaten either one, because I know it would lead me down the road to ruin. I’m not able to have “just a bite” and then stop. How would a recovering alcoholic handle it if offered a drink, just for her? In my mind there is no difference. But then again, there is always getting back on the wagon afterwards. If you did indeed eat the desserts, I hope you will get back up and start again, because after all, you’re doing this for YOU, and nobody else will reap the rewards of good health and happiness. Fingers crossed for you, hoping you’ll hear what I have said with love in my heart.
Of course I do Djan, that goes without saying. And that was my biggest fear…my biggest ‘fat’ driver (people pleasing) twinned with my biggest fear of tumbling out of the sweet spot and not being able to get back in like an addict falling off the wagon and ending up back at square one. But I’m ok. I’m looking down at my toes, and they are safely inside the sweet spot…I wasn’t perfect, but I made it…I’m still in the game 🙂
If it was me, I would have eaten it. Hence I am still very overweight.
But the best solution I can come up with is to have a few bites and share with your friends.
Hey chica, thanks for your thoughts…out of two heads, one plan! D x
Eat the cake. Not because you want to please the chef or the manager or anyone but you. When it’s your birthday, especially a milestone birthday, you have to stop scrutinizing everything and say, “Ok!” Balance is difficult, but if we always so no, we are so much more likely to go off the wagon completely. I hope you ate the cake. I would have!
I love your confidence Tracey and that’s absolutely the place I want to get to – you’ve faced down your demons and got completely on top of your strategies to stay in your own sweet spot and we’re all incredibly proud that you did. I’m sure I’m not the only person in the posse that holds this up as an example of what great looks like! D x
Hah!! I was sort of looooking out for today’s post, and it didn’t disappoint! I went bust laugh. good ‘thoughty’ piece, again!
i can hardly wait to read posse replies. as for you, Dee, i have no apprehensions. i can hear those wheels solidly under yr caboose. Fleury
So many responses Fleury, both on here and by email, huge range of perspectives but all offered with support and genuine care. You know what, I bloody love you guys!! D x
Wait – HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I’m so glad you’re having such a marvelous romp!
To the dilemma . . . sigh – a toughie indeed. I’d have at least had a bite and exclaimed over how glorious it was, encouraged the friends to share, and explained how I didn’t think I could eat one more bite. But I’m so impressed with how hard you’re sticking in a really difficult situation!!!!!!
Thanks Cherie…I started my birthday celebrations two weeks early and I’m going to make sure they last at least two weeks after the event, so your birthday wishes will ring on my ears for at least the next month! D x